The Art of Quitting Smoking

Well days 2 and 3 were fun. I haven't had a cigarette since New Years night (go me)! I would be lying if I said it hasn't been hard, it has been extremely hard. I came to realize when I woke up yesterday morning that it wasn't the nicotine that I was addicted to, it's the ritual of the act. Every morning I get up and grab the dogs leash and grab a cigarette. Smoking allowed me to escape the boredom of walking my dog in the freezing cold or the burning heat of the summer! There are only about 3 situations that make me want to smoke; boredom, stress, & socializing. By eliminating those situations in my life I should have no problem quitting, right. But Houston we have a problem, those 3 small situations that prompt me to smoke are life. I can't change or eliminate those things from my life. I just need something else to concentrate on.  I fully prepared myself with 15 packs of gum (no lie) to supplement for my other craving. So instead of concentrating on my smoke rings, I concentrated on not biting my tongue or cheek. Great, I made it through the morning. Now I really tested myself by dealing with a stressful situation, which stress is a major trigger for me. I went to visit my grandmother in the hospital, she was in a crowded room of family. I love them but it can be stressful. Well again with lots of pieces of gum I failed to have a single cigarette the entire time. By the time we got home I was so exhausted that I rushed my dog out for a quick walk and wasn't even slightly tempted to smoke.
Today I woke up feeling like crap and craving a cigarette and hoping that the headache would go away. I spent most of my day in bed sick, probably withdraws, and reading. The cravings are becoming less evil but they still exist. So in a nutshell, Days 2 & 3 finished successfully, lets hope that the next month continues the same way.

Aside from quitting smoking there are 11 other resolutions to complete. Today I did something really difficult. I decided that in order for me to move on that I needed to delete some photos of my past. It's bad enough having the memories but to see them on a daily basis is really hard. So today I deleted them, oh there was hesitation but once the window popped up with the "Are you really sure you want to delete this" question, every trace of hesitation was gone. Once I pressed okay a soothing feeling came over me, like I had fully closed that chapter in my life. If only deleting photos allowed me to complete this resolution, I wish. I'm not sure what step in the process will be the deciding one on which I know that this resolution will be complete, I kind of figured that I will just know.

Well enough deep thinking for now, more sleep is needed.